Blog Archive

Where Justice Begins

I was invited to write this post for the wonderful group of people at the Downtown Reading Society (my post is here). This courageous community is wrestling with the concept of justice and all its rivulets. I have deep respect for the…

Read More about Where Justice Begins

Go to Bed Angry

Its marriage advice most Christians hear at some point. Don’t go to bed angry. Make up before you sack out for the night. I’ve certainly heard it my requisite few dozen times in books or sermons on marriage. And I’m…

Read More about Go to Bed Angry

Leave Starving Children in Africa Alone

“We become free by transforming ourselves from unaware victims of the past into responsible individuals of the present, who are aware of our past and are thus able to live with it.” Alice Miller Its time to leave starving children…

Read More about Leave Starving Children in Africa Alone

Never Use This As A Motivation For Change

“Our war is not with flesh and blood.” Paul “Love yourself.” Jesus I sat with a man last week who is trying to get out of debt. He’s got the usual sort of stuff – a bit of credit card…

Read More about Never Use This As A Motivation For Change

Why The Holidays Are Hard

Lets face it. No one can escape the festal fervor of this season. Whether you want to or not, you are anticipating Christmas. Blame it on everyone. Like Starbucks, with those beady little red cups everywhere. Which I imagine to…

Read More about Why The Holidays Are Hard

How To Make Your Holidays More Meaningful

“When you’ve nothing else construct ceremonies out of the air and breath upon them.” Cormac McCarthy It doesn’t take much to make your holidays more meaningful. But it sure is easy to believe it does. Our family was adopted last…

Read More about How To Make Your Holidays More Meaningful

Enemies Where You Least Expect

“The tongue has the power of life and death.” Proverbs 18:21 I have a young face. I really do. Go look at my picture. I once got carded at a liquor store and even with an I.D., the woman wasn’t…

Read More about Enemies Where You Least Expect

For When You Are Stuck

“There is no way out of the inner life. So one had better get into it.” Parker Palmer “The spiritual life does not remove us from the world but leads us deeper into it” Henri Nouwen “Let me learn by…

Read More about For When You Are Stuck

Real Guilt Doesn’t Feel Like Guilt

“Don’t you realize that it is God’s kindness that is trying to lead you to him and change the way you think and act?” Romans 2:4 “Those who look to him are radiant. There faces are never covered in shame.”…

Read More about Real Guilt Doesn’t Feel Like Guilt

Parenting As One Thing

“A parent’s unconscious is a child’s first reality.” Louis Cozolino “Love covers over a multitude of sins.”  1 Peter 4:8 Brandt had been crying for over an hour. I mean this guy was straight singing the blues wailing. And there…

Read More about Parenting As One Thing

Why You Must Trust Your Emotions

“Emotions are the language of the soul.  They are the cry that gives the heart a voice.”  Dan Allender, Tremper Longman “I’ve never met an irrational emotion. Once you know the whole story, they always make sense.” Sue Johnson “Things…

Read More about Why You Must Trust Your Emotions

Give A Man His Swagger

“Don’t muzzle your ox as he treads the grain press.” Deuteronomy 25:4 “I did it!” Brandt Yesterday morning during the middle of my first sip of coffee, our two year old son Brandt ran into the room. “I wanna go…

Read More about Give A Man His Swagger

Join my free Substack Newsletter

Join my free Substack Newsletter, 'The Heart of It.' A publication on sexual wholeness, trauma recovery, and the Christian story. I write to find the pulse of the human heart amidst it all.

Get the first chapter of my new book The Sex Talk You Never Got and my e-book Story Formed free for signing up.

sign up bonuses